I know it may be a little early to post for all of August yet, but I figure its close enough to the end of the month.
August has also been eventful, but in awesome ways!
The first week was pretty great! I was with a friend and two of her cousins the first part of the week and then went to the YSA conference. Which was awesome! Outside of it being way too hot! It was so great to get away for almost a week and have some fun.
Monday, the 6th, I was anticipating. I had my work recommend from my Bishop. I went down to Deseret Industries hoping to finally start working. I met with the hiring manager, he was nice. Had me come back later for an interview. I was praying so much! I really needed that job! I came back for the interview. When he asked me what my career goals are, I froze. I didn't really have any and I didn't know what to say. He told me that if they have a spot open up, he'd call me. I felt so bad! I was thinking that if they wouldn't hire me, even with the recommend, then I wouldn't stand a chance getting hired anywhere else.
Having the question posed to me of what my career goals are, really got me thinking. I didn't have a plan. I didn't know what I was going to do. Even what I wanted to do. I knew cosmetology was out. I prayed and school was brought up as an option. I started looking up online colleges. Still kind of unsure. I was thinking that I had always been interested in psychology. I sent requests to 3 different schools for more info. Walden called me first. Talking to her helped me with really thinking about psychology. Then Capella called me the next morning. She asked me questions that were more personal and actually seemed like she cared about what I want. It felt right talking to her about that school. Kaplan called me right after, he seemed very to the point and was all about getting me to enroll in the school and didn't really want to know anything about me.
After a lot of thinking and praying, I decided to apply for Capella University. The adviser sent me the entrance exams. I spent Monday, the 13th doing them. That Tuesday morning I got a call from her saying I had passed both exams first try. I was/am so excited!! I start September 10th!
On Thursday, the 16th, I got a call from the hiring manager asking me if I want to work. I was surprised, but happy. I immediately said yes. I started work on Monday, August 20th :-D I am so so so thankful!!!! I had just passed my 9 months of being unemployed on the 19th.
I learned a lesson about not missing a morning with reading/listening to the scriptures. One morning last week, I was sitting in my car before work. I went to listen to some of Mosiah. The app wasn't working right. I decided instead of reading the chapter, I would pass on it altogether. That was the wrong choice for me to make. As I was getting up to head inside, I lost my car keys inside my car. I know, sad right? Losing car keys in the car... I looked for them for 10 minutes and I couldn't find them. I was so upset. I went inside and couldn't get the combination lock off my locker for anything. I spent at least 5 minutes or so working with it and trying and trying again before it finally unlocked. I know my combination, it just wasn't happening. It was really frustrating. Then it got worse. I was picking up a scarf from the floor and put it on the table then a spider came crawling off it. It took all I had in me to not freak out openly. I was really really scared. Me and spiders do not mix well. I didn't want to go get someone in case it disappeared amongst the other stuff on the table. I took a bowl on the table and slammed it on top of the spider. Fortunately it was a little one, but all the same. I don't care if they are smaller than my fingernail or how ever big, they are scary and I don't like them. At break I went to my car in attempt to find my keys, I was having no luck. I stopped and prayed for help. Then I looked and sure enough they were underneath my seat. Later I was having trouble again with my combination lock. I stopped and prayed for help. Then I tried again and it came undone just fine. The rest of the day went alright. I found out later that night when I was saying my nightly prayers that my deliberate decision to not read scripture when I couldn't listen to it brought on the lesson. I'm not making that mistake again..
Hopefully things will keep going up from here!
I remember with the early part of this year and the bulk of this summer where its was just one thing going wrong after the other. It felt like the trials were never going to end. I still remember the prompting I got back in, I want to say May, that things would be getting worse before they get better. I was freaked out and I didn't understand. Things had finally come to a lull and I was happy with the break. When I got that, I was thinking, what else could there be? Now I know. I know that things are finally on their way up, slowly and steadily, but up all the same :)
"Blessed is the man that endureth temptation: for when he is tried, he shall receive the crown of life, which the Lord hath promised to them that love him." - James 1:12
"And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose." - Romans 8:28
"There hath no temptation taken you but such as is common to man: but God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it." - 1 Corinthians 10:13
"My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into many afflictions;
Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience. But let
patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire,
wanting nothing." - James 1 2-4 (JST)
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Tuesday, August 28, 2012
Monday, August 27, 2012
July 2012
July was quite a month. My patience and faith have definitely been tested.
As some of you may know, I was in another car accident with my mom on July 4th. It was worse than the previous two. I was preparing to turn left across 2 lanes. Very heavy traffic. A truck on the inside lane stopped. I couldn't see around the truck, I waited, they waived me to pass. I started to go and as I was crossing the outside lane, we were smashed into by a much larger truck. The passenger side of my car is partially crunched in.
Thankfully, my mom wasn't injured. Injuries sent me to the hospital twice. I went the night of the 5th because I couldn't move my neck or back. Then I had to go again that Saturday - I think, it might have been that Friday - because I was unable to walk. My neck, back, and left knee were sprained.
Upon inspection of my car, where we were hit, was in the best possible spot of the passenger side. The vehicle hit the frame. If I had been slower, the vehicle would've crashed into my dented wheel well, who knows what that would've done to my tire/axle. If I had been faster, the vehicle would've hit the passenger door head on. I don't like to think about the results that could've caused.
Although the car accident happened, and it sucked, He was still protecting my mom and I. He made it as light as I believe he reasonably could.
"Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness" - Isaiah 41:10
"But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint" - Isaiah 40:31
I found that out quite literately Thursday, July 5th. Part of the reason I was with my mom was there was some important stuff that she needed to be able to go do and I was taking her. After that accident the previous day, I was able to move around and walk while I was helping her. Once we were back at home and I was done, I was no longer able to move. A lot of times I would say, "I don't know how I was able to do that" and other variations. He made it happen. He lifted me up and made me move. I shouldn't have been able to walk or drive, move period. After, I wasn't able to. He is the only one who can make the not possible, possible. I needed to be able to help my mom so He willed it to happen.
After that I was not able to drive for about 2 weeks. I was not able to walk without the assistance of a back brace, left knee bandaged, and crutches for about 3 weeks.
I had three goals for July. One, to be able to walk on my own without any assistance by my birthday which was on July 28th. Two, I really wanted a birthday party. Three, I wanted to go to the Temple on my birthday.
I had been trying to plan a party for my birthday. It wasn't going all that well. When it was announced that there was an endowment session at 5pm that night. I was so bummed. One, because no one would be able to come, and two because I can't go to endowment sessions yet.
About mid-July I think it was, It was announced that there would be a 6am baptism session on July 28th. I was so excited! I was determined to go, bandaged or not. I was still very scared to drive. That morning I got up at 3-3:30am and got ready and left at 4:30am. I had estimated there would be traffic. There wasn't any. I got to the Temple at about 5:00am and hung outside for a bit. I hadn't been to the Temple without the sun being up in months. I still remember the awe, peace, and joy I felt. I didn't know the Temple would be open that early in the morning. I sat inside the preparation room for the remaining time. Jittery and bouncy, doing my best to be reverent. No one else showed up for the baptism session until 6:00am when another girl that shares her first name with me came. It was great to be able to help another family with names. I have all my female names done for now. It was great.
I had given up on having a party. Due to the car accidents on 6/17 and 7/4, I wasn't able to try and start work any sooner than August. It was hard to deal with, but something I had accepted. I had signed up to feed the missionaries on the 27th. I started to invite a few friends over to join in and have a small birthday dinner. The small birthday dinner turned into the birthday party I wanted. It was awesome and so much fun! I was so happy that it turned out.
I was really scared to drive. I had been hearing a lot of cracks about how I shouldn't drive on holidays because the 3 accidents on holidays. Too many people seemed to act like what was happening to me was some sort of joke. That me being injured was too regular of an occurrence and that it was my doing. I can't remember who all it was. It got real old, real fast. The first part of this year was really rough. Anyway, I just wanted to say that in case anyone who reads this is one of the ones who made fun at my expense.
I decided to test how I'd be able to get along with the crutches and bandages out in public. A friend of mine picked me up for outreach on Thursday, July 19th. I got around alright. I settled that I'd be able to get around like that on my birthday if all else fails.
My first time driving after the beginning of the month, was kind of nerve racking. It was on Saturday the 21st. I wanted to test myself. I drove to Target without any bandages, crutches, etc and brought my brother with me in case my neck locked up. I did alright driving, walking wasn't happening yet. That was a move forward and a setback in one.
On Thursday, July 26th, was my first time outside without crutches. I was able to get around alright with just my knee bandaged and my back brace on. I felt like that was a real accomplishment.
That Friday, the night of my party, because I was just outside my apartment complex, I decided that I would try and go outside without any braces or bandages. I moved around just fine. I was so happy!
Then the day of, July 28 I was able to walk, move around, drive. Everything was normal. I wasn't in any pain. Again, something I had given up on being able to do. Then when it came down to it, I was able to.
Something I find interesting is, I hadn't prayed for help with any of my goals. I don't know why I didn't. Not really anyway. I guess I had given up hope on them enough to not bother to ask. It goes to show, to prove that He loves us so much! That He cares about us. That what we care about and want, He cares about as well. I had heard about it, but I guess never really put much into it.
I kind of want to end this entry with is never give up hope. Never give up on faith. A little faith goes a long way. I've learned so much, I've grown so much in these months of trials. My knowledge of Him is greater. My faith in Him is so much stronger. It wasn't real weak to begin with, but its much stronger now. I am more patient. Or at least I try to be. Its a struggle and an ever work in progress, but its getting there.
He knows what is best. We don't. The sooner that we can give it up and follow along and not try to do it all on our own, the sooner He can be there, help us, and bless us.
As some of you may know, I was in another car accident with my mom on July 4th. It was worse than the previous two. I was preparing to turn left across 2 lanes. Very heavy traffic. A truck on the inside lane stopped. I couldn't see around the truck, I waited, they waived me to pass. I started to go and as I was crossing the outside lane, we were smashed into by a much larger truck. The passenger side of my car is partially crunched in.
Thankfully, my mom wasn't injured. Injuries sent me to the hospital twice. I went the night of the 5th because I couldn't move my neck or back. Then I had to go again that Saturday - I think, it might have been that Friday - because I was unable to walk. My neck, back, and left knee were sprained.
Upon inspection of my car, where we were hit, was in the best possible spot of the passenger side. The vehicle hit the frame. If I had been slower, the vehicle would've crashed into my dented wheel well, who knows what that would've done to my tire/axle. If I had been faster, the vehicle would've hit the passenger door head on. I don't like to think about the results that could've caused.
Although the car accident happened, and it sucked, He was still protecting my mom and I. He made it as light as I believe he reasonably could.
"Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness" - Isaiah 41:10
"But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint" - Isaiah 40:31
I found that out quite literately Thursday, July 5th. Part of the reason I was with my mom was there was some important stuff that she needed to be able to go do and I was taking her. After that accident the previous day, I was able to move around and walk while I was helping her. Once we were back at home and I was done, I was no longer able to move. A lot of times I would say, "I don't know how I was able to do that" and other variations. He made it happen. He lifted me up and made me move. I shouldn't have been able to walk or drive, move period. After, I wasn't able to. He is the only one who can make the not possible, possible. I needed to be able to help my mom so He willed it to happen.
After that I was not able to drive for about 2 weeks. I was not able to walk without the assistance of a back brace, left knee bandaged, and crutches for about 3 weeks.
I had three goals for July. One, to be able to walk on my own without any assistance by my birthday which was on July 28th. Two, I really wanted a birthday party. Three, I wanted to go to the Temple on my birthday.
I had been trying to plan a party for my birthday. It wasn't going all that well. When it was announced that there was an endowment session at 5pm that night. I was so bummed. One, because no one would be able to come, and two because I can't go to endowment sessions yet.
About mid-July I think it was, It was announced that there would be a 6am baptism session on July 28th. I was so excited! I was determined to go, bandaged or not. I was still very scared to drive. That morning I got up at 3-3:30am and got ready and left at 4:30am. I had estimated there would be traffic. There wasn't any. I got to the Temple at about 5:00am and hung outside for a bit. I hadn't been to the Temple without the sun being up in months. I still remember the awe, peace, and joy I felt. I didn't know the Temple would be open that early in the morning. I sat inside the preparation room for the remaining time. Jittery and bouncy, doing my best to be reverent. No one else showed up for the baptism session until 6:00am when another girl that shares her first name with me came. It was great to be able to help another family with names. I have all my female names done for now. It was great.
I had given up on having a party. Due to the car accidents on 6/17 and 7/4, I wasn't able to try and start work any sooner than August. It was hard to deal with, but something I had accepted. I had signed up to feed the missionaries on the 27th. I started to invite a few friends over to join in and have a small birthday dinner. The small birthday dinner turned into the birthday party I wanted. It was awesome and so much fun! I was so happy that it turned out.
I was really scared to drive. I had been hearing a lot of cracks about how I shouldn't drive on holidays because the 3 accidents on holidays. Too many people seemed to act like what was happening to me was some sort of joke. That me being injured was too regular of an occurrence and that it was my doing. I can't remember who all it was. It got real old, real fast. The first part of this year was really rough. Anyway, I just wanted to say that in case anyone who reads this is one of the ones who made fun at my expense.
I decided to test how I'd be able to get along with the crutches and bandages out in public. A friend of mine picked me up for outreach on Thursday, July 19th. I got around alright. I settled that I'd be able to get around like that on my birthday if all else fails.
My first time driving after the beginning of the month, was kind of nerve racking. It was on Saturday the 21st. I wanted to test myself. I drove to Target without any bandages, crutches, etc and brought my brother with me in case my neck locked up. I did alright driving, walking wasn't happening yet. That was a move forward and a setback in one.
On Thursday, July 26th, was my first time outside without crutches. I was able to get around alright with just my knee bandaged and my back brace on. I felt like that was a real accomplishment.
That Friday, the night of my party, because I was just outside my apartment complex, I decided that I would try and go outside without any braces or bandages. I moved around just fine. I was so happy!
Then the day of, July 28 I was able to walk, move around, drive. Everything was normal. I wasn't in any pain. Again, something I had given up on being able to do. Then when it came down to it, I was able to.
Something I find interesting is, I hadn't prayed for help with any of my goals. I don't know why I didn't. Not really anyway. I guess I had given up hope on them enough to not bother to ask. It goes to show, to prove that He loves us so much! That He cares about us. That what we care about and want, He cares about as well. I had heard about it, but I guess never really put much into it.
I kind of want to end this entry with is never give up hope. Never give up on faith. A little faith goes a long way. I've learned so much, I've grown so much in these months of trials. My knowledge of Him is greater. My faith in Him is so much stronger. It wasn't real weak to begin with, but its much stronger now. I am more patient. Or at least I try to be. Its a struggle and an ever work in progress, but its getting there.
He knows what is best. We don't. The sooner that we can give it up and follow along and not try to do it all on our own, the sooner He can be there, help us, and bless us.
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