My mom just told me that it was today in 1985 that she found out she was pregnant and the baby turned out to be me :) I think it's awesome she remembers that! :)
I love my Mom! I'm blessed to be one of her kids. I'm so glad that our Heavenly Father gave me the parents He did.
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Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
He Hears Us
one of my favorite songs is "He Hears Me" by Hilary Weeks, David Osmond did a cover of it on his CD, Road Less Traveled - I love his version of it!!!
This was all pouring in my head while I was driving home from work on the morning of 12/13/11 as a message from the Holy Ghost
He hears me, hears us. All the time. Not only in prayer, but also in our actions and in our thoughts. This was reaffirmed to me in the last relief society meeting about the Final Judgement. We need to be careful about what is floating around in our minds. He hears everything. He sometimes answers our thoughts as if we had prayed.
People will say "the power of the mind", "power of thought", "you can make things happen just by thinking about it a lot" then when it happens, they often think they did it themselves. It was Him answering those thoughts.
Something that I was given from the Spirit I found interesting:
"He hears and sees everything for everyone. Something to keep in mind with your thoughts: If He came down today and was standing speaking with you, would you say those thoughts to Him directly? If yes, then go ahead. If no, then you shouldn't be thinking them. Although you may not think of your thoughts as direct communication, they are. Just as prayer is, but prayer is more powerful than thoughts."
Then I got to thinking, that is how silent prayers work.. you think them, address Him directly and He hears you. Although with normal thoughts, you aren't addressing Him directly, He can still hear you. It makes sense why pure thoughts are important.
"But this much I can tell you, that if ye do not watch yourselves, and your thoughts, and your words, and your deeds, and observe the commandments of God, and continue in the faith of what ye have heard concerning the coming of our Lord, even unto the end of your lives, ye must perish. And now, O man, remember, and perish not" - Mosiah 4:30
"A person's thoughts may also be a prayer if they are directed to God" - Prayer, The Guide to the Scriptures, Study Helps
When I was working at Qwest/Centurylink, I would get tired of being at work. I kept thinking, if I only had the time, all the great things I would do. There were drawings and various other projects that I started that I wanted to do. If only I had the time. That was answered when I was in between jobs. I was off for two weeks. In that entire two weeks, all I did was complain about being home and how I wanted to be working. I didn't touch any of the projects that I originally wanted so bad to do. It hit me weeks later that my thoughts had been answered. I was given what I wanted, but I didn't see it. Now I wish that I had taken advantage of the time I was given. Now a few of the projects I had wanted to do, its too late. Two of the people left and one had passed on. I'm trying harder to be more appreciative and see things more externally that so internally.
On November 12th, I was working security for a apartment complex. All I was really focused on is that I was hungry. In the tenant lounge next to the desk, there was a birthday party. I remember thinking that I wish I was a part of it to have some of the food. That became all I was thinking about. How cool it would be if they offered something to me. I figured it would never happen and knew that it was a kind of selfish thought. I was careful not to look in their direction. At the end of the party, guests disbursed and it was just the people running it. They offered me some of the food. I was surprised because even though it was what I wanted, I never actually thought it would happen. I immediately said, no thank you. I was worried about a field supervisor showing up and catching me eating. I would have been in trouble. They asked again, I declined a second time. I heard the Spirit say to me, "Please don't ask for things you don't actually want". I felt stupid. After hearing that, I realized that our Heavenly Father was trying to grant me my requests for food and then I shot it down.
On December 3rd, I was called into work 10pm - 10am. I was at school until 6:30pm, went to a baptism 7-8, fed the missionaries 8-9, then left for work. On my way to work, I was regretting accepting the shift. I didn't want to be there. I wanted to be at home asleep. I was tired through and through. I had only accepted the shift for the money. I had been praying for extra work so I can have money to pay my bills. I figured the call for the shift was an answer to prayer and I wasn't going to turn it down. I was still worried about working the full 12 hours. I was worried that I would be too tired to drive home. Plus if I left at 10am Sunday morning, that would mean I would be late for Church. All of it was causing me great concern. Since I was driving, I wouldn't be able to pray for help. When I got to work, one of my bosses was there waiting for me. He told me the shift was shortened from 10-10 to 10-4. I was confused and asked him why. He said he didn't know. The shift is standard 10-10, they had no reason to shorten it. He said they just suddenly decided to split the shift without a reason. They just did. After he left, I sent up a prayer of thanks. I was so grateful. I could handle 6 hours.
On December 10th, I was called into work midnight - 8am. As the evening went on, I realized that I would be too tired to drive. I couldn't call out. They were depending on me. My friend Mike wasn't home. I was thinking that it'd be great if he would be willing to drive me back and forth. On the other hand, he hates driving to Seattle. I figured he wouldn't do it, but that it'd been really great if he did. After some pondering this, I finally decided to just text him and ask. I figured he'd say no, but that there's no harm in asking. A couple minutes later, he texted me back agreeing to help me out. I prayed and thanked our Heavenly Father for Mike helping me.
On December 11th, I was having a lot of difficulties with my shift. I was scheduled to come back and work midnight - 6am, Monday morning. I really didn't want to come back. I wanted to just stay home after Church. I thought that if Mike was willing to drive me back and forth again that I'd be able to do it. I was glad when 8am came around and it was time to go home. When Mike picked me up, he was boiling mad. Traffic was all messed up. The bulk of Seattle was being shut down for the Jingle Bell run. He told me, never again. That he hated Downtown Seattle and he is not driving down there again. I felt bad, I was apologetic to the situation. I felt it best not to argue with him about it. I was thinking, what am I going to do? I could come down to Seattle by myself and fight for parking, but I really didn't want to. I was worried and bummed. Then at 10am, I was about to leave for Church when the scheduling supervisor asked me if I could take a different shift. Instead of working the site in Seattle, they needed me to do the day shift in addition to my normal night shift at Swedish Sleep Center in Issaquah. I immediately accepted. It meant I didn't have to go to Seattle and I got to work at my normal site. I wouldn't have to worry about parking. I would be working an extra 8hrs instead of an extra 6 and I got to be home Sunday night. After the call was finished, I sent up a prayer of thanks for helping me out.
On December 12th, I was sitting at work thinking that it would be cool to work the day and night shift more often. A few minutes later, I received a call from the scheduling supervisor asking me to work the day and night shift a second day. I accepted and sent up a prayer of thanks.
I'm so thankful to know that our Heavenly Father hears us. Sometimes it doesn't occur to me to pray about something, but i'll be thinking about stuff. That He'll answer thoughts as well is comforting to me. More proof that he loves us.
"Now Zeezrom, seeing that thou has been taken in thy lying and craftiness, for thou hast not lied unto men only but thou hast lied unto God; for behold, he knows all thy thoughts, and thou seest that thy thoughts are made known unto us by his Spirit" Alma 12:3
This was all pouring in my head while I was driving home from work on the morning of 12/13/11 as a message from the Holy Ghost
He hears me, hears us. All the time. Not only in prayer, but also in our actions and in our thoughts. This was reaffirmed to me in the last relief society meeting about the Final Judgement. We need to be careful about what is floating around in our minds. He hears everything. He sometimes answers our thoughts as if we had prayed.
People will say "the power of the mind", "power of thought", "you can make things happen just by thinking about it a lot" then when it happens, they often think they did it themselves. It was Him answering those thoughts.
Something that I was given from the Spirit I found interesting:
"He hears and sees everything for everyone. Something to keep in mind with your thoughts: If He came down today and was standing speaking with you, would you say those thoughts to Him directly? If yes, then go ahead. If no, then you shouldn't be thinking them. Although you may not think of your thoughts as direct communication, they are. Just as prayer is, but prayer is more powerful than thoughts."
Then I got to thinking, that is how silent prayers work.. you think them, address Him directly and He hears you. Although with normal thoughts, you aren't addressing Him directly, He can still hear you. It makes sense why pure thoughts are important.
"But this much I can tell you, that if ye do not watch yourselves, and your thoughts, and your words, and your deeds, and observe the commandments of God, and continue in the faith of what ye have heard concerning the coming of our Lord, even unto the end of your lives, ye must perish. And now, O man, remember, and perish not" - Mosiah 4:30
"A person's thoughts may also be a prayer if they are directed to God" - Prayer, The Guide to the Scriptures, Study Helps
When I was working at Qwest/Centurylink, I would get tired of being at work. I kept thinking, if I only had the time, all the great things I would do. There were drawings and various other projects that I started that I wanted to do. If only I had the time. That was answered when I was in between jobs. I was off for two weeks. In that entire two weeks, all I did was complain about being home and how I wanted to be working. I didn't touch any of the projects that I originally wanted so bad to do. It hit me weeks later that my thoughts had been answered. I was given what I wanted, but I didn't see it. Now I wish that I had taken advantage of the time I was given. Now a few of the projects I had wanted to do, its too late. Two of the people left and one had passed on. I'm trying harder to be more appreciative and see things more externally that so internally.
On November 12th, I was working security for a apartment complex. All I was really focused on is that I was hungry. In the tenant lounge next to the desk, there was a birthday party. I remember thinking that I wish I was a part of it to have some of the food. That became all I was thinking about. How cool it would be if they offered something to me. I figured it would never happen and knew that it was a kind of selfish thought. I was careful not to look in their direction. At the end of the party, guests disbursed and it was just the people running it. They offered me some of the food. I was surprised because even though it was what I wanted, I never actually thought it would happen. I immediately said, no thank you. I was worried about a field supervisor showing up and catching me eating. I would have been in trouble. They asked again, I declined a second time. I heard the Spirit say to me, "Please don't ask for things you don't actually want". I felt stupid. After hearing that, I realized that our Heavenly Father was trying to grant me my requests for food and then I shot it down.
On December 3rd, I was called into work 10pm - 10am. I was at school until 6:30pm, went to a baptism 7-8, fed the missionaries 8-9, then left for work. On my way to work, I was regretting accepting the shift. I didn't want to be there. I wanted to be at home asleep. I was tired through and through. I had only accepted the shift for the money. I had been praying for extra work so I can have money to pay my bills. I figured the call for the shift was an answer to prayer and I wasn't going to turn it down. I was still worried about working the full 12 hours. I was worried that I would be too tired to drive home. Plus if I left at 10am Sunday morning, that would mean I would be late for Church. All of it was causing me great concern. Since I was driving, I wouldn't be able to pray for help. When I got to work, one of my bosses was there waiting for me. He told me the shift was shortened from 10-10 to 10-4. I was confused and asked him why. He said he didn't know. The shift is standard 10-10, they had no reason to shorten it. He said they just suddenly decided to split the shift without a reason. They just did. After he left, I sent up a prayer of thanks. I was so grateful. I could handle 6 hours.
On December 10th, I was called into work midnight - 8am. As the evening went on, I realized that I would be too tired to drive. I couldn't call out. They were depending on me. My friend Mike wasn't home. I was thinking that it'd be great if he would be willing to drive me back and forth. On the other hand, he hates driving to Seattle. I figured he wouldn't do it, but that it'd been really great if he did. After some pondering this, I finally decided to just text him and ask. I figured he'd say no, but that there's no harm in asking. A couple minutes later, he texted me back agreeing to help me out. I prayed and thanked our Heavenly Father for Mike helping me.
On December 11th, I was having a lot of difficulties with my shift. I was scheduled to come back and work midnight - 6am, Monday morning. I really didn't want to come back. I wanted to just stay home after Church. I thought that if Mike was willing to drive me back and forth again that I'd be able to do it. I was glad when 8am came around and it was time to go home. When Mike picked me up, he was boiling mad. Traffic was all messed up. The bulk of Seattle was being shut down for the Jingle Bell run. He told me, never again. That he hated Downtown Seattle and he is not driving down there again. I felt bad, I was apologetic to the situation. I felt it best not to argue with him about it. I was thinking, what am I going to do? I could come down to Seattle by myself and fight for parking, but I really didn't want to. I was worried and bummed. Then at 10am, I was about to leave for Church when the scheduling supervisor asked me if I could take a different shift. Instead of working the site in Seattle, they needed me to do the day shift in addition to my normal night shift at Swedish Sleep Center in Issaquah. I immediately accepted. It meant I didn't have to go to Seattle and I got to work at my normal site. I wouldn't have to worry about parking. I would be working an extra 8hrs instead of an extra 6 and I got to be home Sunday night. After the call was finished, I sent up a prayer of thanks for helping me out.
On December 12th, I was sitting at work thinking that it would be cool to work the day and night shift more often. A few minutes later, I received a call from the scheduling supervisor asking me to work the day and night shift a second day. I accepted and sent up a prayer of thanks.
I'm so thankful to know that our Heavenly Father hears us. Sometimes it doesn't occur to me to pray about something, but i'll be thinking about stuff. That He'll answer thoughts as well is comforting to me. More proof that he loves us.
"Now Zeezrom, seeing that thou has been taken in thy lying and craftiness, for thou hast not lied unto men only but thou hast lied unto God; for behold, he knows all thy thoughts, and thou seest that thy thoughts are made known unto us by his Spirit" Alma 12:3
first message i ever wrote
I wrote this back on July 22nd. I was going to give it in the testimony meeting, but it was deemed to be too long, so I didn't. I recently found it on my computer so I'm going to share it now.
Hi, over the last month or so all the lessons between Gospel
Principals and Relief Society have been connecting with what is going on in my
life. Especially the last two Gospel Principals classes about the Holy Ghost
and the gifts. I was first prompted to write this on Friday, July 22 and its
been building since then. I was prompted that this testimony is important to
share. It has been an important lesson for me to learn. I feel that it will
affect someone in someway. That’s all any writer can hope for is to affect one
person. I’m thankful for the promptings I get. Sometimes He comes to me as the
small still voice, sometimes pours words into my head to write down, and
sometimes He is loud and in my face. I am very glad I get to share this with
you. I was prompted to write the following poem Monday, July 18th.
To share it with as many as will listen. Its called Live For Today:
I don’t want to be
I wish I had
I wish I would
I wish I did
I wish I could
Don’t forget the ones
You care about
Don’t forget the ones
You love
‘Cause
One day
When its too late
Don’t want to have
Don’t want to have
Any regrets
We never know
When He’s going to
Take us back
Never forget to say I love you
Live for today
Live for today
There’s no excuse
For making excuses
There’s no such thing
As no time for family
We’ve got to appreciate
Those we’ve got
While we’ve got them
While we’re here
‘Cause
One day
When its too late
Don’t want to have
Any regrets
We never know
When He’s going to
Take us back
Never forget to say I love you
Live for today
Live for today
Too many people
Waste their lives
They don’t make time
For those that matter
They’re too concerned
In tomorrow, tomorrow
What happened yesterday
Yesterday doesn’t matter
Its already gone
Tomorrow doesn’t matter
Its not here yet
Today matters
Its here, its now
One day
When its too late
Don’t want to have
Any regrets
We never know
When He’s going to
Take us back
Never forget to say I love you
Live for today
Live for today
Thank our Father for our lives
Thank our Savior for our lives
Thank them for
Everything we have
Don’t take life for granted
We’re here on borrowed time
We don’t know
When it’ll be time
For us to go home
One day
When its too late
Don’t have
Any regrets
We never know
When He’s going to
Take us back
Never forget to say I love you
Live for today
Live for today
Not taking life and
each other for granted is a sentiment I’ve seen a lot recently. However not
usually in pure manners. I hear a lot of songs on the radio that promote going
to bed with a stranger or being loose in general. One I hear the most often is
Give Me Everything by Pitbull. Part of the chorus says:
“Tonight I want all of you tonight
Give me everything tonight
For all we know we might not get tomorrow
Let’s do it tonight”
I’ll hear that on 2-3 stations all playing that same song at the same
time. It brings across a basic, live for today message, but not in the right
way. A few years ago there was a song that was great. If Today Was Your Last
Day by Nickelback. The second verse says:
“If today was your last day
and tomorrow was too late
Could you say goodbye to yesterday?
Would you live each moment like your last?
Leave old pictures in the past
Donate every dime you have?
If today was your last day.”
I wish there were more songs that promoted it in a pure way. Influences
by the media are huge. There have been attempts to bring the message across,
but a lot of people don’t want to think about it. Its not a happy thing to
think about. It is still important.
I think a lot of
people don’t think about it until they are hit with it directly. For instance,
my friend Mike and his grandfather. Mike lived in close proximity to his
grandfather for years. Over the last 2 that I’ve known him, he would keep
saying, I should visit my grandfather. He would not actually go. His
grandfather was no more than maybe 30 minutes away. He only visited his
grandfather 5 times. Once at a barbecue, once in the hospital, once when he
found his grandfather’s health was rapidly decreasing, once at the hospice, and
then the final time at his grandfather’s funeral. His grandfather passed
earlier this year. After that he kept saying, I wish I had spent more time with
him, I wish I had visited him, I wish, I wish, I wish, I wish I had told him
that I love him.
I am thankful that I
converted, was baptized, and was confirmed receiving the gift of the Holy Ghost
when I did. I strongly believe that if I didn’t, that if I didn’t have Him as a
constant in my life. If I wasn’t open to His promptings, If I was unclean to
where He could not dwell, then my life would continue to be in a downward
spiral. I feel very blessed that I am here and relatively happy.
I am so thankful for
the gifts of the Holy Ghost. It wasn’t until the last lesson about the gifts
did I think that what happened to me was really even possible. Now I know that
it is. Not taking life and each other for granted is something that my mom has
tried to teach me, my whole life. I never wanted to think about it. I didn’t
want to deal with it. So I didn’t. I was always, it doesn’t matter how much I
screw up today because there is always tomorrow. I am so thankful for this
life. I’m not sure if I’ve ever been so happy to wake up in the morning. Now
I’m dedicated to praying every morning when I wake up and every night before I
go to sleep. That was something I had fallen out of doing on a regular basis.
Every time I thank Him for my life, my family, my friends, and for being given
that day. Any lingering doubt I may have had about the Godhead is gone.
A few of the things I
think we are supposed to learn is love and family. We are given such an
incredible gift. We are given a body, a life. We get to come here to learn and
grow. To live righteously, Christ-like. So we may return to live with the
family that has passed and our Heavenly Father. It saddens me to see people
waste their lives. One can only imagine how it feels for our Father to see some
of his children waste and not take advantage of this gift. One could also
imagine what it is like for Him to see those that appreciate what we’ve been
given, live, and flourish. My only guess is as a proud parent who watches their
children succeed.
There is no such
thing as too many hugs, kisses, time spent with each other, or too many I love
you’s. If you lost a loved one today, would you have any regrets? If you were
to pass today, would you have any regrets? I am still working on the answers to
those questions. We never know when our time will come. It could be today,
tomorrow, next week, or years from now. Appreciate those we have, while we have
them, while we’re here and Live For Today.
I found these verses I want to share:
“Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take
thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is evil thereof” –
Matthew 6:34
“Whereas ye know not shall be on the morrow. For what is your life? It
is even a vapour, that appeareth for a little time, and then vanisheth away” –
James 4:14
“But of that day and that hour knoweth no man, no, not the angels
which are in heaven, neither the Son, but of the Father” – Mark 13:32
I know that The Church is true, that God is our Father, that Jesus is
his Son and our Savior, and that the Holy Spirit is our comforter and at times
protector.
I leave this testimony with you in the name of Jesus Christ,
Amen
Thursday, December 8, 2011
in the world, but not of the world
I was bored at work so I decided to help stay awake by looking at funny stuff on failblog.com..
I noticed an offshoot called Bros. I decided to look at it just for the heck of it. It is full of pictures of the Jersey Shore crap and "men" acting questionably.
Partly it was amusing, like these people really exist.. haha.
Then it was troubling, these people really exist.. behaving in the manner that they do. Whether its bad acting, staged, or not, on the Jersey Shore stuff, it still bothering that there are young men and young women that really do behave in such a manner. To think that there are kids being exposed to that stuff. Entertainment or not, its not actually funny. It makes me concerned about the society people's kids and one day in the future my future kids may be exposed to. What is seen as acceptable is getting more and more loose. It seems values are going on the way side. As an option, not an expectation.
Before joining the Church, I behaved questionably. But not as badly as the examples of today.
I think it makes it even more important that parents and future parents pay attention to what their kids are being exposed to and what they are doing. It matters. Growing up, I didn't make it easy for my parents, but now I am thankful that they did keep an eye on me. That they did parent me. I thought it was the worst ever back then. Now I am thankful. While I ran reckless somewhat, the values I was taught were still in the back of my mind.
The following scripture has been floating around in my mind:
"If ye were of the world, the world would love his own: but because ye are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world, therefore the world hateth you." John 15:19
Even though we may not fit in with society, today's society isn't something that we want to fit into.
I noticed an offshoot called Bros. I decided to look at it just for the heck of it. It is full of pictures of the Jersey Shore crap and "men" acting questionably.
Partly it was amusing, like these people really exist.. haha.
Then it was troubling, these people really exist.. behaving in the manner that they do. Whether its bad acting, staged, or not, on the Jersey Shore stuff, it still bothering that there are young men and young women that really do behave in such a manner. To think that there are kids being exposed to that stuff. Entertainment or not, its not actually funny. It makes me concerned about the society people's kids and one day in the future my future kids may be exposed to. What is seen as acceptable is getting more and more loose. It seems values are going on the way side. As an option, not an expectation.
Before joining the Church, I behaved questionably. But not as badly as the examples of today.
I think it makes it even more important that parents and future parents pay attention to what their kids are being exposed to and what they are doing. It matters. Growing up, I didn't make it easy for my parents, but now I am thankful that they did keep an eye on me. That they did parent me. I thought it was the worst ever back then. Now I am thankful. While I ran reckless somewhat, the values I was taught were still in the back of my mind.
The following scripture has been floating around in my mind:
"If ye were of the world, the world would love his own: but because ye are not of the world, but I have chosen you out of the world, therefore the world hateth you." John 15:19
Even though we may not fit in with society, today's society isn't something that we want to fit into.
Never Alone
I had written a thank you email to Bishop Lindstrom and this is part of what I got back in return:
"I'm so glad you had a good experience and hope it strengthened your testimony of how much Heavenly Father loves His children."
I was pondering that and was given this message:
"Recall when you thought that you were alone? That you thought you wouldn't have family in eternity? You are incorrect. You do have family that will be there. 22 of the family members you personally turned in. 11 you were proxy for. You need not be concerned with this. You are and never will be alone"
I was really comforted by that. I was thinking about that Sunday, November 28th when the sad, negative stuff was coursing through me. Reaffirmed that it is wrong.
Tuesday really did strengthen my testimony. I know that our Heavenly Father loves me and loves all of us. If he didn't, he wouldn't have done/do everything he does. He wouldn't have sent His only Begotten Son Jesus Christ to Earth. To Die for our sins so we may be saved. He wouldn't make it possible for us to live eternally with Him and our families. He wouldn't have given us mortal bodies to live and learn. He wouldn't have created Adam and Eve. He wouldn't have come with Jesus Christ to Joseph Smith to establish the One True Church on Earth. We wouldn't pray to him every morning and night. NONE of this would have EVER happened if our Heavenly Father didn't love us. We are so lucky, so blessed. To think there are still so many who don't realize it or don't believe. It saddens me. But, it makes me even more want to become a full-time missionary so I can help teach others about the Church and show much He loves us. I believe that if more people knew that they would join the Church. If they realize how much their lives can be blessed, how much their lives can change. If they hear how much I've changed in the short time I've been with the Church. If they can realize how much our Heavenly Father truely loves each of us, they will join.
I know and I would never go back to before the Church
In the name of Jesus Christ,
Amen
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Radiating indescribable joy!
Last night - 12/6/11 - was amazing.
Earlier in the day, I was getting ready to leave. I had some time and I was prompted to watch David A Bednar's talk from the October 2011 conference. I forgot what it was about. I sat down and watched it and it is about doing family history work, baptisms for the deceased, and Temple work. I felt even more confident that what I will be doing is important work. It helped me to watch it.
It was a Temple trip between Mukilteo and Everett 2nd wards. I had done a good amount of family research during the 2 weeks earlier this year when I wasn't working. I printed off 10 women and 10 men, so I was ready. When I spoke with the office, I found I would be able to be baptized and confirmed for the women. But that I would not be able to watch the proxy for the men. I was bummed, but went along with it. I asked Sister Porterfield if I could at least watch the confirmation since I wouldn't be able to watch the baptism. She checked with Bishop Porterfield and he said I could. I was satisfied with that.
I was called to go first. I was kinda nervous and shaky. I took a few deep breaths and said a silent prayer for calmness and strength. Then the ordinance took place. I owe Bishop Lindstrom a huge thank you for doing his best to get me upright each time my feet flew out from underneath me! It couldn't have been easy... haha. I was happy to maintain my reverence. That's normally something that I have trouble with. As each name was done I felt almost a jumping up a down inside me. It was really cool. But I was determined not to bust up laughing.
After a few of us girls were done they sent us to have dinner. When I was done, I went back to the viewing room and they were getting the boys done. I was concerned that they were already done with the men that I turned in. I sat there wishing that I could have seen the male cards I turned in be completed. I was sure they were already done. The next young men went in and they started to read names and I realized they were doing the ones I turned in. I was so happy! I stopped myself from laughing. But I didn't hold back the huge smile that spread across my face. I knew at that moment that He heard me and was granting me that. I wouldn't be able to watch the confirmations because I had to go to work. I got to watch the first and that was really special. Sister Porterfield told me what time it was so I wouldn't be late for work. I thanked her, but I wanted to wait until the young man came out so I could thank him for being the proxy for the men that I turned in. When he came out, I went up to him and thanked him. He looked at me like, um ok..., but it was important for me.
Side note: Bishop and Sister Porterfield are awesome people. I am so thankful that they helped watch out for me. I love them! Sometimes they feel like another set of parents in addition to my actual parents.
Afterwards, I took off for work. Once inside my car I couldn't hold it in anymore and bust up in joyous laughter and a huge smile. It was an amazing feeling. It felt like it was more than my joy. It was joy of the 20 spirits who now have the chance at eternity together. I swear I heard whispered thank you's. I never want to forget how that felt!!
I am so thankful for the Temple. For the saving ordinances. For all of it really. Its so amazing what we get to do. It definitely makes me want to make sure that I stay worthy to have access to the Temple!!
In the name of Jesus Christ,
Amen
Earlier in the day, I was getting ready to leave. I had some time and I was prompted to watch David A Bednar's talk from the October 2011 conference. I forgot what it was about. I sat down and watched it and it is about doing family history work, baptisms for the deceased, and Temple work. I felt even more confident that what I will be doing is important work. It helped me to watch it.
It was a Temple trip between Mukilteo and Everett 2nd wards. I had done a good amount of family research during the 2 weeks earlier this year when I wasn't working. I printed off 10 women and 10 men, so I was ready. When I spoke with the office, I found I would be able to be baptized and confirmed for the women. But that I would not be able to watch the proxy for the men. I was bummed, but went along with it. I asked Sister Porterfield if I could at least watch the confirmation since I wouldn't be able to watch the baptism. She checked with Bishop Porterfield and he said I could. I was satisfied with that.
I was called to go first. I was kinda nervous and shaky. I took a few deep breaths and said a silent prayer for calmness and strength. Then the ordinance took place. I owe Bishop Lindstrom a huge thank you for doing his best to get me upright each time my feet flew out from underneath me! It couldn't have been easy... haha. I was happy to maintain my reverence. That's normally something that I have trouble with. As each name was done I felt almost a jumping up a down inside me. It was really cool. But I was determined not to bust up laughing.
After a few of us girls were done they sent us to have dinner. When I was done, I went back to the viewing room and they were getting the boys done. I was concerned that they were already done with the men that I turned in. I sat there wishing that I could have seen the male cards I turned in be completed. I was sure they were already done. The next young men went in and they started to read names and I realized they were doing the ones I turned in. I was so happy! I stopped myself from laughing. But I didn't hold back the huge smile that spread across my face. I knew at that moment that He heard me and was granting me that. I wouldn't be able to watch the confirmations because I had to go to work. I got to watch the first and that was really special. Sister Porterfield told me what time it was so I wouldn't be late for work. I thanked her, but I wanted to wait until the young man came out so I could thank him for being the proxy for the men that I turned in. When he came out, I went up to him and thanked him. He looked at me like, um ok..., but it was important for me.
Side note: Bishop and Sister Porterfield are awesome people. I am so thankful that they helped watch out for me. I love them! Sometimes they feel like another set of parents in addition to my actual parents.
Afterwards, I took off for work. Once inside my car I couldn't hold it in anymore and bust up in joyous laughter and a huge smile. It was an amazing feeling. It felt like it was more than my joy. It was joy of the 20 spirits who now have the chance at eternity together. I swear I heard whispered thank you's. I never want to forget how that felt!!
I am so thankful for the Temple. For the saving ordinances. For all of it really. Its so amazing what we get to do. It definitely makes me want to make sure that I stay worthy to have access to the Temple!!
In the name of Jesus Christ,
Amen
my father and our Heavenly Father
Yesterday - 12/6/11 - as my Dad surprised me with awesomeness, I was thinking about similarities between my mortal father and my Heavenly Father. There aren't a lot, obviously, but one thing sticks out to me.
When you follow His commandments and do what you're told by our Heavenly Father, he rewards you and blesses your life.
When I do what my Dad wants me to do, he rewards and unknowingly blesses my life.
My Dad had been wanting me to learn how to drive. I had been scared to bits of it. Whenever I got behind the wheel of a vehicle, the thought that was always coursing through my mind was, this is how I'm gonna die. My Dad went as far as putting me through driver's ed. When I dropped out, he was extremely mad. When push came to shove with my roommate, I was forced to learn how to drive. I wasn't having much luck. I certaintly didn't make things easy for my roommate. I didn't want to. I don't like being told that I have to do something that I don't want to do. He was to the point of giving up. I had tried taking the knowledge test and my mind went blank. I was about to give up. Then in May, while I was in the process of joining the Church, I tried again. I gave praying for help a shot. I went in and aced the knowledge test. I was filled with confidence, I could really do this. It was exciting. Then on June 3rd, it was time for my drive test. I was filled with anxiety. I was sure I was going to fail. But if I failed then my roommate wasn't going to give me rides anymore and I would have been royally screwed. I can't remember how many times I prayed that day. All the way up to the instructor getting in the vehicle with me, I was praying for help. Then I took the test and I just barely passed. With an 82 actually. When the instructor told me that I passed, I was filled with joy and thankfulness. That was a very happy afternoon. I told my Dad and sent him a picture of my temporary license. Then he surprised me saying that he will pay for my car and deposited a large chunk of money in my bank account. I was so shocked and happy. Thankful. I didn't use it as he wanted me to do.. but I did get a car. Its banged up and bruised, but I love my car.
My Dad had been after me about getting dental work done. He gave up after a while and was making a case through my brother instead. I've been mortified of dentists all my life. I've had a lot of bad experiences with dentists. I was scared. Then while I was doing family research, I found that there are dentists in my family. Through recommendation of my Dad's cousin, Daryl's wife Stacie, she suggested to me one of their 3 sons, Kale because his practice is in Everett. I told my Dad and found out that he had been keeping me under his dental insurance. Then in October, 14 years later, I walked into the dental office. I was so nervous, not scared. I had been expecting to do into a panic attack. I prayed for strength. I focused more on excitement of meeting Kale. Out of the family research I've done, he's the first I've found and gotten to meet. When he walked in the room, it was really exciting and I was really happy. Outside of finding out that I need a lot of work done.. but it occurred to me that each time I'm in there is more chance to get to know him. I told my Dad and on one of the visits, he came with me and prepaid all of the work I'm going to need done. I was shocked, surprised, and thankful. After he left, I remember saying to the receptionist, wow my Dad is awesome. She was like, yeah he is. I wrote to him thanking him and telling him that I think he's awesome.
Side note: Kale is a fantastic dentist!! I'm not scared to go to the dentist anymore! I had written them a poem about their office.. I hope they got it.. If you are in need of a dentist, go to him!!
www.everettfamilydental.com
My Dad had been wanting me to go to college. Last September, I decided that I wanted to go into cosmetology. I told my Dad, he was not supportive. In July when I dropped out, he was furious. I had pleaded my case so hard, and then I just gave up. In October, I got the chance to go back. I figured, why not. I still have the passion for it. I was just thinking that I screwed myself on ever going back to school, then the school wrote to me. I went in and tested and was accepted back into college. I told my Dad and he was very happy and proud of me. He had told me that if I get good grades, that he would pay the student loans that I had accumulated thus far. I was like, ok cool. Last week, I got a letter from Sallie Mae about loans that I accumulated when I went to University of Phoenix and dropped out. I was getting confused because I was told that when I started Paroba College of Cosmetology in November, that my loans would go into in-school deferment. Yesterday, I decided to call Sallie Mae to figure out what was going on. They told me that they just received a large payment on November 29th. I was even further confused because I never made a payment. I asked for more information and they told me that my Dad payed off my student loans and that I'm caught up to date until 6 months after I graduate. I was shocked and surprised. I sent him an email of thanks. What my Dad doesn't know is that he's helped clear part of my debt, which inches me a little bit closer to my goal of becoming a full-time missionary :-D
This has all happened after I joined the Church.
I'm so thankful for my Dad. Thankful for my parents. When I first heard that we are put with our parents for a reason, I remember scoffing. I didn't used to get along with my parents. I know now that its true. I'm so thankful that our Heavenly Father placed me with my Mom and Dad. I love them so much.
In the name of Jesus Christ,
Amen
When you follow His commandments and do what you're told by our Heavenly Father, he rewards you and blesses your life.
When I do what my Dad wants me to do, he rewards and unknowingly blesses my life.
My Dad had been wanting me to learn how to drive. I had been scared to bits of it. Whenever I got behind the wheel of a vehicle, the thought that was always coursing through my mind was, this is how I'm gonna die. My Dad went as far as putting me through driver's ed. When I dropped out, he was extremely mad. When push came to shove with my roommate, I was forced to learn how to drive. I wasn't having much luck. I certaintly didn't make things easy for my roommate. I didn't want to. I don't like being told that I have to do something that I don't want to do. He was to the point of giving up. I had tried taking the knowledge test and my mind went blank. I was about to give up. Then in May, while I was in the process of joining the Church, I tried again. I gave praying for help a shot. I went in and aced the knowledge test. I was filled with confidence, I could really do this. It was exciting. Then on June 3rd, it was time for my drive test. I was filled with anxiety. I was sure I was going to fail. But if I failed then my roommate wasn't going to give me rides anymore and I would have been royally screwed. I can't remember how many times I prayed that day. All the way up to the instructor getting in the vehicle with me, I was praying for help. Then I took the test and I just barely passed. With an 82 actually. When the instructor told me that I passed, I was filled with joy and thankfulness. That was a very happy afternoon. I told my Dad and sent him a picture of my temporary license. Then he surprised me saying that he will pay for my car and deposited a large chunk of money in my bank account. I was so shocked and happy. Thankful. I didn't use it as he wanted me to do.. but I did get a car. Its banged up and bruised, but I love my car.
My Dad had been after me about getting dental work done. He gave up after a while and was making a case through my brother instead. I've been mortified of dentists all my life. I've had a lot of bad experiences with dentists. I was scared. Then while I was doing family research, I found that there are dentists in my family. Through recommendation of my Dad's cousin, Daryl's wife Stacie, she suggested to me one of their 3 sons, Kale because his practice is in Everett. I told my Dad and found out that he had been keeping me under his dental insurance. Then in October, 14 years later, I walked into the dental office. I was so nervous, not scared. I had been expecting to do into a panic attack. I prayed for strength. I focused more on excitement of meeting Kale. Out of the family research I've done, he's the first I've found and gotten to meet. When he walked in the room, it was really exciting and I was really happy. Outside of finding out that I need a lot of work done.. but it occurred to me that each time I'm in there is more chance to get to know him. I told my Dad and on one of the visits, he came with me and prepaid all of the work I'm going to need done. I was shocked, surprised, and thankful. After he left, I remember saying to the receptionist, wow my Dad is awesome. She was like, yeah he is. I wrote to him thanking him and telling him that I think he's awesome.
Side note: Kale is a fantastic dentist!! I'm not scared to go to the dentist anymore! I had written them a poem about their office.. I hope they got it.. If you are in need of a dentist, go to him!!
www.everettfamilydental.com
My Dad had been wanting me to go to college. Last September, I decided that I wanted to go into cosmetology. I told my Dad, he was not supportive. In July when I dropped out, he was furious. I had pleaded my case so hard, and then I just gave up. In October, I got the chance to go back. I figured, why not. I still have the passion for it. I was just thinking that I screwed myself on ever going back to school, then the school wrote to me. I went in and tested and was accepted back into college. I told my Dad and he was very happy and proud of me. He had told me that if I get good grades, that he would pay the student loans that I had accumulated thus far. I was like, ok cool. Last week, I got a letter from Sallie Mae about loans that I accumulated when I went to University of Phoenix and dropped out. I was getting confused because I was told that when I started Paroba College of Cosmetology in November, that my loans would go into in-school deferment. Yesterday, I decided to call Sallie Mae to figure out what was going on. They told me that they just received a large payment on November 29th. I was even further confused because I never made a payment. I asked for more information and they told me that my Dad payed off my student loans and that I'm caught up to date until 6 months after I graduate. I was shocked and surprised. I sent him an email of thanks. What my Dad doesn't know is that he's helped clear part of my debt, which inches me a little bit closer to my goal of becoming a full-time missionary :-D
This has all happened after I joined the Church.
I'm so thankful for my Dad. Thankful for my parents. When I first heard that we are put with our parents for a reason, I remember scoffing. I didn't used to get along with my parents. I know now that its true. I'm so thankful that our Heavenly Father placed me with my Mom and Dad. I love them so much.
In the name of Jesus Christ,
Amen
"Idle minds are the Devil's workshop"
I was watching "Call It What You Want", a video by Foster The People and saw that quote. I figured it came from someone else so I've been searching and found this:
There is a set of English proverbs that are worded similarly:
- Idle hands are the devil's workshop
- Idle hands are the devil's tools ("Collections" 1808)
- Idle brains are the devil's workhouses (T. Fuller 1732)
- An idle brain is the devil's workshop (H. G. Bohn, "Hand-Book of Proverbs," 1855)
- If the Devil finds a Man idle, he'll set him at work (J. Kelly, "Scottish Proverbs," 1721)
- The devil finds work (or mischief) for idle hands to do
"An idle brain is the devil's workshop" is actually from the "Hand-Book of Proverbs" H.G. Bohn.
I was thinking about stuff that will happen to me sometimes.
I’ll be sitting at work. Alone and its quiet. I’ll get
random thoughts bouncing around in my head. Usually they are harmless random
stuff. Sometimes I’ll hear the Holy Ghost telling me something or prompting me
to do something. However, the thoughts are not always benign.
Occasionally I’ll get loud negative thoughts in my head.
With words to try and stir insecurity, disbelief, doubt, and dislike. That was
happening on Monday night, 12/5/11. Its stuff that I used to get wrapped up in
and sink. I’m not as susceptible to them now. They are very loud, overshadowing
quieter thoughts, obnoxious, hard to listen to. It takes work to tell it, no
you’re wrong. I’m thankful that I can tell the difference now. I’m thankful for
the strength that I receive to dispel the negatives and not fall to them again.
There is no way in the world that I want to become wrapped up in despair again
and sink to the bottom. Now that I’m a member of the Church, I can receive help
from the Godhead to help keep me up and out of that lake of fire.
More reasons I’m eternally grateful that I joined the
Church!
In the name of Jesus Christ,
Amen
2015 Quilt by ONE and (RED)
I got an email to make a patch on a massive online quilt for World Aids Day. I think what they are doing is pretty cool so I'm reposting it here
OH and you get a free music download from The Killers.. the lead singer Brandon Flowers is a member of the Church :)
"In 1987, a quilt created by The Names Project Foundation covered the National Mall in Washington, D.C., memorializing those we lost to AIDS. Today, we stand at the threshold of another defining milestone in this fight: by 2015, we should be able to provide treatment to the millions more who need it, drastically reduce new infections, and virtually end the transmission of HIV from mothers to their babies. 1.4 million HIV+ pregnant women need access to treatment – treatment that only costs about 40 cents a day.
It can be done. But we need your help to get there.
Join millions of existing ONE and (RED) supporters. Add your panel to the (2015)QUILT. Make a pledge to do more and a thank you gift will come your way. Our friends, THE KILLERS have once again recorded a Christmas song for us— their 6th song for the cause. Add your pledge to the (2015)QUILT and receive one of (THE KILLERS) RED Christmas songs for free.
The beginning of the end of AIDS starts with you.
AN HIV+ PREGNANT WOMEN CAN GIVE BIRTH TO AN HIV FREE BABY.
98% OF MOTHER-TO-CHILD HIV TRANSMISSION INCIDENTS ARE PREVENTABLE
YET, MORE THAN 1,000 BABIES ARE BORN EVERY DAY WITH HIV
AND HALF OF CHILDREN BORN WITH HIV WILL DIE BEFORE THEIR 2ND BIRTHDAY WITHOUT TREATMENT
SO WHAT WILL IT TAKE TO VIRTUALLY END THE TRANSMISSION OF HIV FROM MOTHERS TO THEIR BABIES BY 2015?
WE NEED TO GET 1.4 MILLION HIV+ PREGNANT WOMEN ON MEDICATION – MEDICATION THAT COSTS AROUND 40 CENTS A DAY
IT’S DOABLE.
THE BEGINNING OF THE END OF AIDS STARTS WITH YOU."
- ONe (red)
Make one today!! :)
where'd the other two pages go?
If you did not see my Facebook post yesterday, here is what's up.
I realized that the pages "experiences with the Holy Ghost" and "Poetry" were just one long list and difficult to read. So I broke it up into 3 blogs.
This one which has testimonies and everyday stuff.
sisterkristae2.blogspot.com has the experiences.
sisterkristae3.blogspot.com has the poetry.
Hope that helps!
I realized that the pages "experiences with the Holy Ghost" and "Poetry" were just one long list and difficult to read. So I broke it up into 3 blogs.
This one which has testimonies and everyday stuff.
sisterkristae2.blogspot.com has the experiences.
sisterkristae3.blogspot.com has the poetry.
Hope that helps!
Tuesday, December 6, 2011
semi-random act of kindness
Thursday is one of my cousin's, Kale's, birthday. The idea came to me a few weeks ago to make him cupcakes. I didn't know what kind to make. I didn't want to ask him directly because that would tip him off. I decided to try calling his office and asking his receptionist - he's a dentist. A great one too and I used to be mortified of dentists before going to him. If you are in need of a dentist and are in the Everett area, check him out... Kale Eckland, Everett Family Dental, www.everettfamilydental.com - anyway back on topic.. I talked his receptionist, Shannon and she seemed puzzled by the question and was like, um, I don't know.. so I decided to pray and ask. The kind that kept popping up in my mind after that was white cake with chocolate frosting. At first I thought, no that's my fav kind and tried again. Each time I asked, the same kind kept coming to me. I made that kind first thing this morning and took into his office. I left it with Shannon, she said that he'll love them because he loves sweets. I thought that was kinda funny, but registered it as a new piece of info learned about him.
As I was driving back home, I got a email from him thanking me. It made me really happy knowing that something simple like making someone cupcakes as an early birthday thing would make them happy. I enjoy making others happy. Especially when they don't expect it.
As soon as I read his email, I felt elation fill me and instant warmth from the Holy Ghost. I couldn't stop smiling. It felt really great :)
I've been thinking about President Monson's talk during the Christmas devotional that aired Sunday 12/4 when he is talking about the book, The Mansion.. thinking about people who do things looking for recognition and not out of the kindness of their hearts. I realized I used to be like that sort of. I know thoughts like that occur to me every so often. I know they are wrong, so I don't do it. Now I like to work more in the background of things. Do something nice and then walk away or purposely not be present when they find it. Maybe find out later from someone else if they found it and what happened. It kinda makes me uncomfortable if I am present when they find it. Seeing they joy and surprise is cool, but at the same time its kinda like I did it just for the heck of it, not for the purpose of thanks.
When I used to work at Centurylink, I used to buy one of my friends the occasional bottle of water. I know its not big, but it made her happy so I enjoyed doing it. But I liked to time it so she would be away from her desk when I placed it and I would be away from my desk when she found it. That was fun.
When I left Centurylink, I wanted my bosses to know that I was leaving for my own reasons and not because of them. So on my last day, I made them little origami hearts with a note attached thanking them each for being good bosses. Then I left and made sure I wasn't there when they found them. I found out the next day when my friend texted me and she told me how they loved them and it made each of them really happy.
When my Dad gave me money to get my car, I had funds left over. My roommate, Mike, was in desperate need of clothing, shoes, etc. He had been exceedingly nice to me with staying here, even after we broke up, and by continuing to drive me around, even though he had no responsibility to me. He went out of his way for me just 'cause that's the kind of person he is. So one day I went up to him and told him that I'm taking him shopping. He was surprised and tried to refuse insisting he was fine. I knew he wasn't fine. I insisted on taking him and getting him what he needed. That was a great and fun day. I loved it. I didn't care about the money, it was that he had what he needed and wanted. I kinda feel like it doesn't pay him back entirely for what he's done for me. But its a start.
I caught flack for it at the time from people and may still. People were/are like.. you took your EX shopping??.. do you still love him or something??.. what's wrong with you??
Its not like that. Yes we were together for a year, and it was a kinda rough breakup.. but people get too stuck in that. Outside of that, he's my roommate and my best friend. Its not weird. Its not what people like to insinuate. Do I love him? As a person and a friend, yeah, I have love for all the people I care about. Beyond him being a friend and roommate, NO. What's wrong with me? Depends on what you think could be wrong... I don't think there is anything wrong with me.
As I was driving back home, I got a email from him thanking me. It made me really happy knowing that something simple like making someone cupcakes as an early birthday thing would make them happy. I enjoy making others happy. Especially when they don't expect it.
As soon as I read his email, I felt elation fill me and instant warmth from the Holy Ghost. I couldn't stop smiling. It felt really great :)
I've been thinking about President Monson's talk during the Christmas devotional that aired Sunday 12/4 when he is talking about the book, The Mansion.. thinking about people who do things looking for recognition and not out of the kindness of their hearts. I realized I used to be like that sort of. I know thoughts like that occur to me every so often. I know they are wrong, so I don't do it. Now I like to work more in the background of things. Do something nice and then walk away or purposely not be present when they find it. Maybe find out later from someone else if they found it and what happened. It kinda makes me uncomfortable if I am present when they find it. Seeing they joy and surprise is cool, but at the same time its kinda like I did it just for the heck of it, not for the purpose of thanks.
When I used to work at Centurylink, I used to buy one of my friends the occasional bottle of water. I know its not big, but it made her happy so I enjoyed doing it. But I liked to time it so she would be away from her desk when I placed it and I would be away from my desk when she found it. That was fun.
When I left Centurylink, I wanted my bosses to know that I was leaving for my own reasons and not because of them. So on my last day, I made them little origami hearts with a note attached thanking them each for being good bosses. Then I left and made sure I wasn't there when they found them. I found out the next day when my friend texted me and she told me how they loved them and it made each of them really happy.
When my Dad gave me money to get my car, I had funds left over. My roommate, Mike, was in desperate need of clothing, shoes, etc. He had been exceedingly nice to me with staying here, even after we broke up, and by continuing to drive me around, even though he had no responsibility to me. He went out of his way for me just 'cause that's the kind of person he is. So one day I went up to him and told him that I'm taking him shopping. He was surprised and tried to refuse insisting he was fine. I knew he wasn't fine. I insisted on taking him and getting him what he needed. That was a great and fun day. I loved it. I didn't care about the money, it was that he had what he needed and wanted. I kinda feel like it doesn't pay him back entirely for what he's done for me. But its a start.
I caught flack for it at the time from people and may still. People were/are like.. you took your EX shopping??.. do you still love him or something??.. what's wrong with you??
Its not like that. Yes we were together for a year, and it was a kinda rough breakup.. but people get too stuck in that. Outside of that, he's my roommate and my best friend. Its not weird. Its not what people like to insinuate. Do I love him? As a person and a friend, yeah, I have love for all the people I care about. Beyond him being a friend and roommate, NO. What's wrong with me? Depends on what you think could be wrong... I don't think there is anything wrong with me.
Sunday, December 4, 2011
12/3/11
I am thankful to know He watches out for me, even when I haven't prayed for help.
On Saturday, 12/3, it was an exceedingly long day. I had school from 8-6:30, then went to a baptism from 7-8, then fed the missionaries from 8-9, then was called in last minute to work 10-10. As the day went on, I really didn't want to go to work. I was exhausted. But i need the money for bills, so i went in.
My roommate was cool and had bought me a couple energy drinks to make it through. When i got to the site, my boss said there had been a sudden change of plans and instead of me working 10-10, i would be working 10-4. I asked him why because normally the shift is 12hrs, they didn't have a reason to change it. He said he didn't know, that they suddenly decided they needed to change it for that one night.
I was happy because if i had had to work 10-10 i would have been late for Church and i wouldn't have been able to get any sleep until after.
The energy drinks weren't working. I was too tired for them to have any effect. I kept falling asleep on my site. I was falling asleep standing up. It was bad. I was worried that l would fall over.
At 2:30am, i was on a rove and i fell asleep. I was suddenly woken up then turned around to find my boss walking towards me.
I know that the shift was shortened and i was woken up because He was watching out for me.
We are so blessed to have our Heavenly Father who knows us, cares, and loves us indefinitely
In the name of Jesus Christ,
Amen
On Saturday, 12/3, it was an exceedingly long day. I had school from 8-6:30, then went to a baptism from 7-8, then fed the missionaries from 8-9, then was called in last minute to work 10-10. As the day went on, I really didn't want to go to work. I was exhausted. But i need the money for bills, so i went in.
My roommate was cool and had bought me a couple energy drinks to make it through. When i got to the site, my boss said there had been a sudden change of plans and instead of me working 10-10, i would be working 10-4. I asked him why because normally the shift is 12hrs, they didn't have a reason to change it. He said he didn't know, that they suddenly decided they needed to change it for that one night.
I was happy because if i had had to work 10-10 i would have been late for Church and i wouldn't have been able to get any sleep until after.
The energy drinks weren't working. I was too tired for them to have any effect. I kept falling asleep on my site. I was falling asleep standing up. It was bad. I was worried that l would fall over.
At 2:30am, i was on a rove and i fell asleep. I was suddenly woken up then turned around to find my boss walking towards me.
I know that the shift was shortened and i was woken up because He was watching out for me.
We are so blessed to have our Heavenly Father who knows us, cares, and loves us indefinitely
In the name of Jesus Christ,
Amen
Friday, December 2, 2011
12/2/11
Thankful this morning. I was woken up at 6am and realized that I forgot to set an alarm before going to bed. Thankful to our Heavenly Father and our Lord Jesus Christ for watching out for me and ensuring that I didn't oversleep :)
as well as by me waking up early, I got ready early and actually left for school on time
Last night I was so freakin tired going from work to school. It occurred to me to pray for help staying awake. I did end up falling asleep, but I was woken up and then 1 minute later a patient showed up for the sleep center. Then i was wide awake for the rest of the shift. I know its because i prayed that i was woken up in the knick of time and was able to stay awake
Thankful for the strength from our Heavenly Father and our Lord Jesus Christ to not overreact, to not get angry, defensive, and the like. One of the students at school, Kristina told another student who was speaking with me, Kim, not to talk to me. Kristina is one of Brittany's, my ex-roommate, friends. She only is aware of Brittany's very narrow dishonest side of things.. She won't even look at me. Even Brittany and I are civil. With the old me, I would have been very upset and would have gone out of my way to set things straight. With the new me, all I can do is laugh about it because the actions of Kristina are not bright. I'm thankful to have the strength to laugh instead of getting upset.
In the name of Jesus Christ,
Amen
as well as by me waking up early, I got ready early and actually left for school on time
Last night I was so freakin tired going from work to school. It occurred to me to pray for help staying awake. I did end up falling asleep, but I was woken up and then 1 minute later a patient showed up for the sleep center. Then i was wide awake for the rest of the shift. I know its because i prayed that i was woken up in the knick of time and was able to stay awake
Thankful for the strength from our Heavenly Father and our Lord Jesus Christ to not overreact, to not get angry, defensive, and the like. One of the students at school, Kristina told another student who was speaking with me, Kim, not to talk to me. Kristina is one of Brittany's, my ex-roommate, friends. She only is aware of Brittany's very narrow dishonest side of things.. She won't even look at me. Even Brittany and I are civil. With the old me, I would have been very upset and would have gone out of my way to set things straight. With the new me, all I can do is laugh about it because the actions of Kristina are not bright. I'm thankful to have the strength to laugh instead of getting upset.
In the name of Jesus Christ,
Amen
Thursday, December 1, 2011
midnight experience
Kinda amazed at something that happened first thing this morning. I left work at midnight. As I was driving home, I was passing by the Temple on I-90 and it was incased in this golden glow. I thought, well that's strange and kept on going. Then I felt this pull to go to the Temple. It felt strange because it wasn't something like a prompting from the Holy Ghost. It was stronger than those. It was a pull that was like I had to go check it out. It wasnt something that I could say no to and keep.going. I Had to. Like an order. So I followed it, turned around and headed towards the Temple. It was around 12:30am. I was surprised to see the gates still open and people still there. I thought it would have been closed up. Well, I got there and found nothing out of the ordinary. The golden glow was lights on the Temple reflecting off of fog. When I stopped, I went outside and the fog disbursed. I immediately felt overwhelmed in the beauty of the building. I really can't describe it. I felt like dropping to my knees right where I stood. I didn't, I returned to my car and after some time left. As I was leaving, I felt better. Not that I felt bad, but I felt better somehow. Then as I was driving, the gravity of what just happened hit me and it was just like, whoa. When I got home and I knelt to pray, normally it comes easily. But I was speechless with how thankful I am towards our Heavenly Father.
Wednesday, November 30, 2011
a testimony of prayer
Something cool. I was worried about being late for work so I prayed before leaving to please not be late for work and if I could get there at around 7:30, that'd be cool. I left and I hardly met any red lights and traffic was literary moving out of my way. I would be behind maybe 5 cars or so and then they would just move like a curtain being opened, then that lane was clear for a while.. I wasn't paying attention to the time, I was in awe and grateful that my prayer was being answered right in front of my eyes. When I got to work and parked, I checked the time and it was exactly 7:30pm :) Immediately I sent up a prayer of thankfulness and gratitude.
On 11/28/11 at 11:33pm I noted the following:
I like this site on Pier 57, but I don't like it at the same time. Some creepy stuff happens down here. Like at the end of my break like maybe 10mins ago, I felt someone firmly tap my left shoulder. I span around, but there is no one here. Or like last night when I was on the side of The Fisherman's restaurant, I kept hearing someone walking around. I was standing still. There was no one there. Tonight if i go over there I feel really uncomfortable, so I leave the area. Nothing happened Friday night. I worry that whoever it is became comfortable with me so he/she started doing stuff. I know that spirits exist. If I remember correctly, we live in the same places, there is just the veil that separates us. Most of the time we can't see them. I don't feel threatened by him/her, but I would like to be left alone. Nothing against him/her, but I can't handle that stuff. I prayed to our Heavenly Father to please protect me from.those living and those not living. I hope He answers my prayer and has them leave me alone.
Shortly after I prayed, I felt comforted by the Spirit and i was protected from whoever is down there. I didn't have anymore problems the rest of that night.
I am thankful for the ability to pray and for us to be able to speak to our Heavenly Father. I'm thankful that He does hear us everytime and does answer our prayers. Its not always immediately like the examples above, but He Never fails. He's always on time, maybe not what we may consider as time. We just need to be patient and faithful and He will always be there for us.
On 11/28/11 at 11:33pm I noted the following:
I like this site on Pier 57, but I don't like it at the same time. Some creepy stuff happens down here. Like at the end of my break like maybe 10mins ago, I felt someone firmly tap my left shoulder. I span around, but there is no one here. Or like last night when I was on the side of The Fisherman's restaurant, I kept hearing someone walking around. I was standing still. There was no one there. Tonight if i go over there I feel really uncomfortable, so I leave the area. Nothing happened Friday night. I worry that whoever it is became comfortable with me so he/she started doing stuff. I know that spirits exist. If I remember correctly, we live in the same places, there is just the veil that separates us. Most of the time we can't see them. I don't feel threatened by him/her, but I would like to be left alone. Nothing against him/her, but I can't handle that stuff. I prayed to our Heavenly Father to please protect me from.those living and those not living. I hope He answers my prayer and has them leave me alone.
Shortly after I prayed, I felt comforted by the Spirit and i was protected from whoever is down there. I didn't have anymore problems the rest of that night.
I am thankful for the ability to pray and for us to be able to speak to our Heavenly Father. I'm thankful that He does hear us everytime and does answer our prayers. Its not always immediately like the examples above, but He Never fails. He's always on time, maybe not what we may consider as time. We just need to be patient and faithful and He will always be there for us.
thoughts 11/30/11
I woke up this afternoon with a smile on my face and a renewed sense of self. I am still glowing from the feelings after visiting Temple grounds last night. I feel just like I did after I was baptized and I'm loving it! I can feel His love and protection. I have His armor on. I can feel the difference
I woke up with the following coursing through my mind.
That I was brought into the Church at this time for a reason. I had reached as far low as I could go, so there was nowhere else to go but up! I know He has something planned for me. Don't know what it is.. but I know that it will be important and great. I am willing to do what He commands.
Part of the reason I feel like I was supposed to join the Church is my experience was so different from how it normally works. I found an old email from when I contacted the missionaries. Here is the timeline:
May 2nd: I recieved prompting to fill out a missionary request online and I did.
May 5th: I received an email from an online set of missionaries. I wrote to them and told them plainly that I wanted to join the Church and needed to know how.
May 6th: First time meeting with Elders Cameron and Fellows
May 15th: First time going to Church.
May 22nd: I was baptized into the Church
May 29th: I was confirmed a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints
June 22nd: My first experience with the Holy Ghost helping me write my testimony and the Untitled poem.
July 3rd: I gave my testimony and poem at the fast and testimony meeting. It was well received. I remember being told that my testimony was strong for being a new convert and one person said that my poem belonged in the Ensign. I have had testimony to give at every fast and testimony meeting from then on out.
Those things do not happen sequentially or so fast for the normal convert. Leads me to think i'm not the normal convert
I know that He loves me just like He loves you and all of His children!
In the name of our Savior Jesus Christ,
Amen
I woke up with the following coursing through my mind.
That I was brought into the Church at this time for a reason. I had reached as far low as I could go, so there was nowhere else to go but up! I know He has something planned for me. Don't know what it is.. but I know that it will be important and great. I am willing to do what He commands.
Part of the reason I feel like I was supposed to join the Church is my experience was so different from how it normally works. I found an old email from when I contacted the missionaries. Here is the timeline:
May 2nd: I recieved prompting to fill out a missionary request online and I did.
May 5th: I received an email from an online set of missionaries. I wrote to them and told them plainly that I wanted to join the Church and needed to know how.
May 6th: First time meeting with Elders Cameron and Fellows
May 15th: First time going to Church.
May 22nd: I was baptized into the Church
May 29th: I was confirmed a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints
June 22nd: My first experience with the Holy Ghost helping me write my testimony and the Untitled poem.
July 3rd: I gave my testimony and poem at the fast and testimony meeting. It was well received. I remember being told that my testimony was strong for being a new convert and one person said that my poem belonged in the Ensign. I have had testimony to give at every fast and testimony meeting from then on out.
Those things do not happen sequentially or so fast for the normal convert. Leads me to think i'm not the normal convert
I know that He loves me just like He loves you and all of His children!
In the name of our Savior Jesus Christ,
Amen
the first testimony I ever gave! - 6/22/11
I have always been the quiet girl in the corner, hiding underneath baggy clothes, and a persistent frown on my face. My nickname was little black rain cloud. Since finding the church, that has completely changed. I talk a lot more, sit with other people, and smile. I always used to be teased because I wouldn’t smile. Teachers, classmates, random people on the street would ask me why I never smile. My answer was always, I didn’t have a reason to. But now I have plenty of reasons to and it feels really good.
I’ve been able to give up my crutches. Things, substances, actions I thought I needed to find happiness. Took pain medication until I went numb, sometimes drinking until I fell asleep, going out on a lot of random dates. Anything I thought that would fill that void. They’ve lost their effectiveness and now I don’t need them at all. All I need is to have faith and attend church to be happy. Such a simple answer, but sometimes so hard to find. I never thought that I would know any sort of true joy. I was always under the misconception that I didn’t deserve it. I will always be thankful to know that is not true. It is because of having faith in our Heavenly Father and Christ that I get to know the truth.
I have learned that genuinely nice people do exist, happy that it is not a myth. I have learned that I don’t have to worry about getting judged or looked down upon by other people. I have learned that it doesn’t matter who I was or what I did. Only who I am and what I do now. I have learned what it is like to have real friends. I have learned what it feels like to have family.
I’ll never forget the day that the voice in my head told me to find out more about the church. So I filled out the missionary request online. I am very glad that I decided to listen to it. Even though I knew pretty much nothing about the church. Took it on pretty much faith alone and I am very glad that I did.
I’ll never forget the night I met the missionaries and when those guys started the process of changing my life for the better.
I’ll never forget when I was baptized and the sheer elation I felt. How it felt like my birthday and that it has given me a new lease on life, I’m running with it.
I’m thankful for all the blessings I’ve been given. For the people I’ve met. For deciding to still live and be here now, when I thought I had so many reasons to give up. Endure until the end. I am so glad that I didn’t opt-out early. I’ve learned I would have missed out on so much. I never thought that I’d say that I’m happy to be alive. But I really truly am. In a sense, finding the church and developing faith has helped save my life.
I am thankful for the second chance I’ve been given. Thanks to Christ atoning for our sins and giving us the opportunity to repent. I no longer have to deal with the huge pile of regret that had been eating away at me. As long as I never do those things again and I know I never will.
On a quick side note that I thought was pretty amazing. I believe the Holy Spirit helped me write this. I probably could have shot from the hip, but I don’t like feeling unprepared. While writing I could feel its influence with the words coming to my head and the process going smoothly. I didn’t have to stop and think about what I was going to say. I just wanted to share that because I think its super cool.
I know that the church is true, that God is our Heavenly Father, and that Jesus Christ is our redeemer and savior. I give this testimony to you in the name of Jesus Christ
Amen.
Testimony of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints - 11/15/11
I have a strong testimony of the Church and moreso, the Holy Spirit. I love to tell my testimony any chance I get, so here it goes.. there is a lot of backstory, but it will make sense in the end.
Joining the Church has changed me and my life.
I was born on July 28, 1986 to two wonderful parents. I am the oldest of 4. We belonged to an Episcopal church, but became inactive in it. My teenage years were all sorts of ups and downs. I became mentally ill. I went to 3 different high schools. It wasn't as bad as it could have been, but it wasn't easy either. Teenage years never are.
At 20yrs, I started to look towards other people for acceptance and found that in a sense with guys, through physical means. I was far from treating my body like a temple...
At 22 years, I moved into a house with my then boyfriend. It was fun for a while... but it was fake. I had developed a skill with being dishonest when I was a child and was really good at it. I had strung him along and told him I wanted to be with him when I really didn't give a care about him at all. There were times when I thought that I could genuinely like him, maybe even love him. It wasn't happening. He was a rather jealous man and we lived with his friends. I was very skinny when I met him. He encouraged laziness and eating alot and I gained a lot of weight being with him. It was something that I resented, but I felt trapped because I needed him financially and I was encased in the lie. I preferred his friends over him and that caused alot of problems. He became very verbally and mentally abusive. At one point we were engaged.. I ended that 2 weeks before our 1yr anniversary by admitting my dishonesty. It was hard to do, but it was something I had to do. I couldn't take it anymore. I was sinking deeper into mental illness and didn't like or care about myself any further. He convinced me to get back together with him. I agreed. There was some thing we were going to do with his friends and he wanted to put on the show of a happy couple. We stayed together for those 2 wks and then he broke up with me the day after our 1 yr anniversary. I remember being happy because that meant I didn’t need to break up with him again. I started drinking after we broke up.
That year I turned 23 and days before my birthday and a month after the previous relationship ended I met a man, Mike. Life was fantastic. I found happiness in him, except my weight was an issue. Things were great until I had a pregnancy scare, which turned out to be nothing. Then that November he lost his job and I supported him and the family that had moved in with us. I was scared of losing him due to a previous breakup and get back together we had that January. So that valentine's day I proposed to him and things started getting better. That March, he started working again and things were starting to even out. That spring I was diagnosed with bipolar type 2 with psychosis. I refused treatment and medication due to previous complications. We had alot of ups and downs until he ended the engagement that September 2010. I was scared. I prayed for 2 weeks for us to be happy and for things to be alright. Then that November we offically broke up.
That was a very scary point in my life because I didn't know what I was going to do. I had not yet learned to drive and we had moved up to Everett so I could go to school, but it was very far away from my work. I was upset that my prayer had not been answered. Although I did not belong to a faith, I still thought that I finally deserved to be happy. It was all I wanted. After much pleading, he came back and agreed to be my roommate on a strictly friends level.
I had the crazy idea that he and I could get back together. That maybe if he saw me with other guys, he would became jealous and want me back. So over the following months I was with a number of guys. It didn't work. All I had succeeded in doing was trashing myself physically, mentally, and emotionally. I had no respect for myself and deeply hated who I had become. I had promised myself when I was younger that I would never drink, never smoke, and wait until marriage to give myself to a man. All that I maintained was I never started smoking.
I decided to try again, desperately looking for some sort of acceptance. In February of this year, I went out with a new guy and found he was still pure. I knew at that point I should have ended it, but I didn't. He fell fast for me and he gave me the attention that I wanted. He accepted me. But I couldn't have cared less about him. All he was to me was a means to an end. But I didn't want to take it from him. I couldn't stand him. He was young and not smart in really an sense of the word. But he wanted to be with me and he was desperate to lose what he had held on to. I knew not to. I knew that I shouldn't. Problem was I had become addicted and that overran my conscience. One night after we headed back from a concert, I did it. After I felt so low. Like the gum on the bottom of someone's shoe. I was so ashamed of myself. But he fell even harder for me. I was warned that would happen. A week after that happened I left him and swore to myself, no more.
A few days later I had started talking to a new guy. He is a member of the Church. But he was always bashing the Church. We met once and it was a flop so we stopped talking.
I had started making changes. I dropped out of college. I couldn’t handle the stress. I swore to myself that I would become celibate until I eventually get married and I stopped drinking. I was never a big drinker. But stopping the other was a more major change.
On Tuesday, May 2, 2011, I was sitting at work when this voice in my head told me to go online to mormon.org and send a missionary request. At first I blew it off, hearing voices wasn't anything new. A few hours later it came back and was louder and repeated until I did it. I didn't really know anything about the Church. I figured, what have I got to lose? I was already at the bottom as far as I was concerned. I told my mom and she did research for me, sending me stuff about the Church. I had some concerns, but blew it off. I figured after all the crap I had done I was beyond any sort of salvation.
That Friday, May 6, my roommate texted me saying that two missionaries had come by that I had sent the request about. I was at work, so I figured, well there went my chance. That night at 8:00pm, they came back. Our apartment building has a call box system set up to my roommate's phone for this room. I was tired and wanted to send them away. But I felt bad because it was pouring rain all day and I felt bad that they had to be in the rain earlier. So I told my roommate to go ahead and buzz them in. I was suddenly aware of how messy my place was, but it was too late to do anything about it. When they came to the door I became very nervous, when I opened it and found the two young men in suits standing there waiting to be let in. I remember thinking, whoa they are here to talk to me!
I looked forward to every lesson, I was absorbing it all up like a sponge. It all made sense. I didn't feel the need to question it and I like to question things. What appealed me to me the most I think out of all of it was the ability to repent and atone for my sins and that with baptism I would be given a new life. A new chance to do things right. It was something I was desperate for and couldn't believe that it was being offered to me. I hesitated at being baptized because I had a fear of being in the water and going backwards.
I first went to Church on May 15th, I felt out of place and at home at the same time. I made a few instant friends. I remember feeling weird because that night I took my roommate to the Rammstein concert.
I was baptized that following Sunday May 22nd. I will forever remember that day as the best day of my life. I don't remember much of it, except it went fast and I remember bursting into laughter as I came back out of the water. I felt so light, fresh, clean, new, and extremely happy. I took forever changing, they came and checked on me 2-3 times because I was just standing back there laughing my butt off in disbelief that I actually had done it.
I was confirmed on May 29th. I remember feeling the rush and instant comfort and I knew the Spirit was with me and will always be.
I had not realized how much I've changed since the baptism until one of the missionaries told me. I like to reflect between who I was and who I am now. I am happy. I like who I am. I am no longer under the influence of Satan. I follow the Word Of Wisdom. I abide by the Law Of Chastity. I don't swear anymore, my vocabulary used to consist of primarily swear words. I haven't missed a day of Church except for one when I took my roommate to the hospital. I have found extended family. I have a great relationship with my parents. I love my family so much. I got my driver's license on June 3rd. I have written many poems through promptings of the Spirit. My life has been spared many times due to promptings of the Spirit. I have been able to receive inspiration about friends through the Spirit. Something kind of amazing, since joining the Church, I have been cured of my mental illnesses. I no longer have them, nor experience any past symptoms of them. I have almost all together stopped being dishonest. I found that the prayer I had sent for Mike and I to be happy was answered. He is my roommate and the best friend I've ever had and overall, we are happy.
At one point I thought that Mike and I could get back together again. I prayed on it a good deal. It was answered, no. Not romantically anyway, but that he will always be a part of my life. I am happy being single. I finally don't need a man to feel accepted. I do eventually want to meet a righteous man and get married, etc. I dream of being a missionary first. I feel like its something I am supposed to and want to do. In July I was prompted to write to the kid I had taken the v-card from and I apologized. On October 25th he wrote back to me, accepting my apology. I no longer feel any of the guilt that I had been holding onto. I am back in the college that I dropped out of earlier this year! I can't count all the blessings in my life through joining the Church, there is so many! I'm so thankful for it all!
I know without a shadow of a doubt that God exists, He is our Heavenly Father. That Jesus Christ is his only begotten son and our Redeemer and Savior. That He sent us the Holy Spirit to be with us - I am so thankful for that!!! I recently learned that if you clear out all the excess thoughts in your mind that you can hear the Spirit's small still voice loud and clear. That Joseph Smith Jr is the Prophet and that he reestablished His Church back on the earth. That President Thomas S Monson is the Living Prophet. That the scriptures are true. That they are the words of God and Jesus Christ. That this is the One True Church!!!
In the name of Jesus Christ,
Amen
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